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Jan 15, 2017 23:30
7 yrs ago
Spanish term

si estuvieran aflojándose

Spanish to English Art/Literary Poetry & Literature Murder mystery novel
Good evening Prozians,
I have a question about the equivalent of “si estuvieran aflojándose” in reference to teeth.

Context: El estómago se me revolvió y comencé a hacer arcadas, sentía los dientes como si estuvieran aflojándose, creí que se me caerían.

Mi intento: I felt sick to my stomach and I began to heave, my teeth felt like they were becoming loose, I thought they were going to fall out.
Proposed translations (English)
5 +6 as though they were coming loose
4 as though they were loosening their grip
4 As if they were becoming loose
4 I felt like my teeth were coming loose
3 as if they were rattling in my head

Discussion

Simon Bruni Jan 16, 2017:
I'm not convinced by Carol's call for something more dramatic, but if you are, then "popping loose" would be an option.
Carol Gullidge Jan 16, 2017:
@ Asker in the context, I feel you need something a little more dramatic than either "becoming" or "coming loose", both of which imply a time lapse that I imagine isn't feasible here. I toyed with "working loose" (to my mind slightly more idiomatic than "coming loose"), but this also fails to work for the same reason.
Maybe you could get away with something like "my teeth felt as though they were about to fall out" or "I had the sensation that my teeth were about to fall out" for the whole of the last part of the sentence?

Proposed translations

+6
14 mins
Selected

as though they were coming loose

I would say "coming loose"
Peer comment(s):
agree JohnMcDove
40 mins
agree Paul García
42 mins
agree Joshua Parker
2 hrs
agree Andy Watkinson
3 hrs
agree Thayenga : :)
6 hrs
agree bizisyl
12 hrs
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4 KudoZ points awarded for this answer. Comment: "Selected automatically based on peer agreement."
11 hrs

as though they were loosening their grip

... only because I feel that both "coming loose" and "becoming loose" - despite being accurate - lack something that this dramatic episode calls for; i.e., they fall a bit flat. I also rejected my own idea of "working loose" for the same reason.

... My teeth seemed to be loosening their grip, as though about to detach themselves entirely / eject themselves / fall out
Peer comment(s):
neutral Simon Bruni : Hi Carol. The problem with this is that "loosening one's grip" is a common set expression, meaning something quite different: http://dictionary.cambridge.org/dictionary/english/loosen-yo... // I'm sure! Also in MacMillan and others :)
5 mins
Hi Simon! Are you sure you're not thinking of "losing your grip"? I'm afraid I usually find that "Cambridge dictionary" extremely suspect//Actually, I take that back in this context, but don't feel that it detracts from my proposal in this instance
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9 hrs

As if they were becoming loose

The phrase "si estuvieran", I would translate as, "as if they were". The term "aflojándose" of course would mean "loosening" or more accurately, "becoming loose".

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Note added at 11 hrs (2017-01-16 10:54:23 GMT)
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For something more dramatic, you could also say, "My teeth felt like they were wiggling loose". Or, "My teeth felt as if they were wiggling loose", for something slightly more poetic than the former.
Example sentence:

After that last meal, my teeth felt wobbly, as if they were becoming loose.

Something went wrong...
16 hrs

I felt like my teeth were coming loose

I felt like my teeth were coming loose
Something went wrong...
16 hrs

as if they were rattling in my head

just another suggestion, along the lines of Carol's and Gabrielle's idea of being more dramatic. A freer, but perhaps more impactful (I hate that word, but it's more concise than the alternative) way of translating the Spanish idea, and certainly creates quite the imagery.
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